Spring Cleaning Safari #1

Three Questions

Once upon a time Leo Tolstoy came up with Three Questions which, once answered, would lead one to The Right Thing To Do. Now, I have come across no shortage of advice about how to tell you about this offering which I am calling the Spring Cleaning Safari, in order to help you to determine if it is the right thing for you, and in order to help you take the plunge if that is the case, or to move along, nothing to see around here, if it is not.

And nothing in the sheaves of Contradictory or more likely Perfectly Pillaged so as to stamp with Personality and avoid Charges of Plagiarism, nothing in the Volumes of Advice on how to write a sales page has hit me with the simple honest directness of Leo’s three questions. So here we go!

What is the best time to do each thing?
Who are the most important people to work with?
What is the most important thing to do at all times?

For my own purposes I will approach those questions in reverse order, and in shortened form. Ready? Here we go!

What is this important thing that I am offering?

The Spring Cleaning Safari. Great. What the hell is that? Okay. Fair question. The Spring Cleaning Safari is an Adventure in Cleaning up your Act. Making up for the excesses of a year of Cakes and Steaks, of Wine and Beer, of Chicken and Chocolate.

A year of Over Eating and Under Sleeping, of Burning the Candle at Both Ends and Operating your Vehicle on the Cheapest Fuel available.
A year of putting everything off until the last minute and stuffing every corner of your home and your life with things to take care of tomorrow and gather dust today.
A year of mixing metaphors like mixing beverages until your whole system is Sticky Sludgie Stuck, and you are wondering if maybe this getting older thing ain’t all its cracked up to be, or is, depending on your relative glass half empty/full ratio.

The Spring Cleaning Safari is the antidote to all of the daily complaints of poor digestion and faltering immune systems:

Weight gain
Foggy thinking
Memory loss
Skin conditions
Hypertension
High cholesterol
Pre-diabetes
Hormonal nuttiness
Blood sugar craziness
Lack of energy
Bloating
General lack of zing

Sound familiar?

Who are the people who would benefit from the Spring Cleaning Safari?

Obviously you are someone who believes in the importance of diet to good health. And you are someone who is looking for better health as well as cognizant that you could use a little boost in your diet. That’s a baseline. If you don’t fall into this group, do not pass go, do not collect 200, mosey on and see if anything else around here looks interesting to you.

Now if you are still with me, you may belong to one of four groups:

You’ve never done a Spring Cleaning and you’re perfectly happy that way.
You’ve never done a Spring Cleaning and you’re a bit interested.
You’ve done a Spring Cleaning before and you have been perfectly happy with the results. You are a bit of an expert yourself.
You’ve done a Spring Cleaning before and you’d like to explore more, you just aren’t quite sure what direction to turn.

Well in this case, it’s odd ones out. One and three take a bow, see you later. Two and four lean in a bit and let’s examine your case.

You’ve never done a Spring Cleaning and you’re a bit interested.

Well you are certainly in the right place. As your guide, I’ve been exploring this territory for over twenty years. I’ve spent time experimenting with dozens of different diets and I’ve been going on my own Spring Cleaning adventures every year for the past decade. In that time I’ve come up against just about every big beast out there, the cleansing reactions, the cravings, the fears and the doubts. I’ve travelled with the best guides and used the most up to date products, and after all of that, I’ve developed a system that is both gentle and effective, adventurous and safe. And guaranteed, of course.

You’ve done a Spring Cleaning before and you’d like to explore more, you just aren’t quite sure what direction to turn.

Perhaps you’ve worked with a kit. Perhaps you’ve worked with a book. Maybe you’ve utilized the internet to research other peoples plans. And you still haven’t had the experience that you are looking for, the opportunity to learn how to take the map into your own hands and gain the knowledge and confidence to explore on your own.

As someone who has been in your shoes, and who taught myself the ways and means to go it alone, I can offer you the opportunity and the flexible system you need to build a Spring Cleaning adventure that is perfect for you, and that will give you everything you need to take your own Spring Cleaning Safari next year, the year after that, and the year after that.

When is the best time to take a Spring Cleaning Safari?

Well the answer to when is always now, and even more so when we are a month away from Summer, and this is the only time that I will be offer the Safari this year! Now is the moment of power. It’s Spring, when the forces of nature are all geared for Fresh and Clean and New, for Waking Up and Bursting Forth, for taking on new projects with Life, Zest, and Vitality.

Now is your chance clean up your act and create the foundation for a healthy and happy Summer Autumn Winter and beyond…